Expectations

When I was younger – much , much younger – I had this image of who I would be when I turned 30. I planned on being the reclusive billionaire writer, idealistic at best a little farfetched at worst, but the dreams of a much younger woman non the less.

Suffice to say that I write only leisurely and am far from a recluse or a billionaire.

Last year, when I was on the precipice of turning 30  and not being anywhere near my goals, my expectations , I was pretty much freaking out. This was not who I thought I would be, or where I thought I would be in my life. This year, barely half a year later, I find I’m much less anxious about who I am. Maybe because it’s much easier to see that life doesn’t stop at 30 when your reach 30, or maybe because I’ve started to notice that many, many people only achieve their goals later in life. Regardless of all this, it’s given me motivation to work towards my goals instead of towards instant gratifications.

This is a new and hard concept for me. I’m not sure I like it much, but sometimes in order to work towards goals we have to be willing to give up things we’d rather not.

So far this hasn’t had the biggest impact on me, I’m typically able to juggle my time alright, though I admit I’m going to have to start focusing more on writing and set aside a dedicated time to do so – which means much less binge watched netflix.

I think the hard part will really be adjusting my expectations of who I am, and who I want to be. Although it’s great to set goals and dreams, I’ve decided I’m better if I make those goals fluid within time. So, the next few months I’m going to work on setting fluid goals, that may have a time line, but are not unreasonable.

What about you Raindrops? Any lowered expectations?

– Leah

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